Brendan Frasier Vows More CGI in His Films

Brendan Frasier, star of the The Mummy Trilogy, has a taste for CGI in his movies. Actually, when I really think about it, what was the last non-CGI film with him in it? I'm thinking it was Gods and Monsters but I'm pretty sure Ian McKellan wasn't real in that film. I mean isn't he dead? Stratch that.. turns out he's still quite alive and trapped in a non-metallic holding cell.

Anyway, I'm starting to think that Brendan Frasier has a clause in his contracts that CGI must be used in his films. I heard he turned down a role in the Sex and the City movie cause they wouldn't use CGI to portray those monsters (carrie, samantha, charlotte, and miranda). In another film, a scene required he eat a stack of pancakes and he wanted Industrial Light and Magic to create the most realistic plate of pancakes you ever seen on the silver screen. That ultimately put the films budget in the red and it was never released.

- Fluffy Clark

Eli Manning is an Amazing Swimmer in the Olympics

Dude.. Eli has been dominating. I heard he's going for the record in these Olympics. Seriously what can't this guy do.

OK.. kidding.. that's not Eli but Michael Phelps sure as hell looks like him. If you don't know how Eli looks.. here's a good shot of Michael... I mean Eli... side by side..

Oh and if they mated... their kid would look like George Muresan (Former NBA player).

- Fluffy Clark

Bucket List Item #7: Divorce Your Wife

Morgan Freeman is living the good life. I guess surviving a near fatal accident made him re-consider my bucket list suggestion. And yesterday, Morgan Freeman can now cross off something on it.

DIVORCE YOUR WIFE.

Nice. I know exactly what was probably going on in Morgan's head while lying down on that hospital bed..

(cue Wonder Years Daniel Stern inner monologue voice to the music of The Byrds "Turn, Turn, Turn)
"For the first time in my life... I realized... I'M FUCKIN' HAWT!! Dude.. I just starred in one of the biggest f-ckin' movies of all-time. I need to seriously get on all dat! Naa mean.... Where mah hoes at? A player's got to play the game son!!"

So turns out Winnie Cooper wrote a book. I love her. Who didn't? She can definitely teach me math anyday. Supposedly she came up with some theorem. I did too. It's called the Fluffy - Cooper Combining Relationship Equation. It's goes a little something like this. If Fluffy = "me", then Cooper = "her". me + her = F-ckin' Amazing!!



So it turns out her real name is Danica McKellar.. who knew..

- Fluffy Clark

Tammy Wynette is Back From the Dead

I'm totally kidding. This is a picture of Mena Suvari at Andy Warhol's 80th Birthday. Did she just age like 50 years before our eyes? Is this future Mena sent back to the past to change the future of her disappointing career? Seriously Mena, Hollywood is all about turning back the clock not going waaaaay forward. I think there's an opening for her in the new Cocoon movie.

- Fluffy Clark

Jenna Jameson Pregnant with the Anti-Christ

Turns out, disease carrying, global extinction, virus carrying, former pornstar, Jenna Jameson is pregnant with Tito Ortiz's Anti-Christ kid. (cue Omen music)

Sanctus... Dominus!!

Seriously, I'm booking my ass to the colony; an underground facility where the best, brightest and most handsome hide during the fallout of the Anti-Christ's war on the human race. Jameson's sexual partners rival the population of China and her body is just a cesspool of new and more deadlier diseases. Throw in the fighting ability of Tito Ortiz and you have the perfect weapon to end all life in the universe.

- Fluffy Clark

Tara Reid is Not "Family Friendly"

Tara Reid had so much potential. The girl can seriously party with the best of them and she totally got paid for it. Well, these days, Tara hasn't been so fortunate and those lavish gigs of kicking off the New Year in some neighborhood bar/sh-thole are starting to dwindle. In other words, the girl needs work like a fat kid needs 8 meals a day.

Anyway, Tara has tried to score a spot on ABC's Dancing with the Stars, but producers don't think she's "family friendly." In other words.. they think she's a drunken mess of a human being on the track to host shows such as Dirty Jobs which in essence, would be about her life 24-7.

Fox News reports....

According to our inside source, the perennial party girl has applied for the show multiple times but was rejected each time on the basis that she isn’t "family friendly" enough. Ouch.

But.. sluts.. I mean.... good wholesome, sex tape filming, christian women like Kim Kardashian gets to bring her badunkadunk to the dance floor.

And speculation has been stirring for quite some time about whether Kim Kardashian will bring her booty into the ballroom — but it looks as though it’s going to be a double whammy this season. A Kardashian camp insider said that Kim will be battling against her mom, Kris Jenner.

- Fluffy Clark

It's Totally in the Bag Andrea Bocelli

Andrea Bocelli's voice is so powerful, women's panties just fall off. And after watching this video, looks like he's going to make the moves on Elmo (Avenue Q style!!). Seriously, European dudes definitely don't understand the concept of personal space. Why does he have to lean closer to Elmo everytime he talks...what are you blind??!! (ok... turns out... I just found out he is actually blind. I really didn't know that. I just added this after I posted.) That's creepy man. Elmo better protect his "special area." Here's the lesson kiddies... never have a European dude sing you to sleep. They are all child molesters.

- Fluffy Clark

Lucius Fox Injured in Car Accident

I'm sure you saw The Dark Knight by now. I mean seriously, everyone in the world probably saw the film. The other day, I was talking to my friend who is an Aborigini in the outback of Austrailia and they even had a tribal screening of the film.

Anyway, I read yesterday that Lucius Fox (AKA Morgan Freeman to you people who didn't see Dark Knight) got into an accident this past weekend. OK, while I'm concerned about his safety and all, I'm more worried about, if he dies, "who is going to make Batman all those wonderful toys?" Seriously, after this accident, I would seriously start to consider a real "Bucket List". Here's what I picture Morgan Freeman's list to look like..

Number 1... "Bang Lindsay Lohan... oh wait... I already have..."

2.) Party with Roger Clemens... and I want him to remember it.

3.) Be the first black James Bond... but instead of 007, I want to be 009 and a half inches. That's more me. Holla!!

4.) Eat a panda.

5.) Make a Shawshank Redemption 2 about the years of Andy and Red going cross country robbing banks and meeting strange folk.

6.) When I die, be buried like those gun slingers of the wild west. Have pennies over my eyes in a striped suit and a lot of blush.... kinda like bozo the clown.


- Fluffy Clark

You Seriously Can't Make This Stuff Up.

Ali Lohan Auditions for Porn

Taken from OMG.com cause they said it best...

Whoops!

On the finale of E!'s Living Lohan, cameras followed 14-year-old Ali Lohan as she went on an audition for the horror movie Trolls.

Unbeknownst to Ali, she auditioned for Peter Davy, director of such adult flicks as Voodoo Lust and Dreams in the Forbidden Zone, TMZ.com reported Wednesday.

Ali obviously had no idea about Davys past," her rep tells Usmagazine.com. "If she did know, she never would have auditioned for him.

TMZ.com reports that Ali's mom Dina "went nuclear" when she got word.

Ali hasn't been quiet about her desire to be famous.

"I grew up watching Lindsay, and it made me want to do what she does," she told Teen Vogue earlier this year. "Just the whole vibe. Being there, being on camera, or onstage, with everybody listening to you ... it's so cool when people look up to you.

"I want it so bad," she said of fame. "So bad you don't even know. And now, it's actually happening. I've already been asked for my autograph, and it's just a really good feeling to have."

Haha. Oh my god... just to add. Ali really wants what Lindsay has but she's a little behind. She needs to start having a lesbian lover, use massive amounts of drugs, attend rehab, breakup marriages, and sleep with as many people in hollywood.

- Fluffy Clark